Monday, November 26, 2007

I had this discussion with a fellow blogger and then decided that some of you would like to hear about this particular 'trial' as I call 'em.
My oldest daughter, who is growing up faster than I can blink, has parsha homework and a teacher that makes 'em think.
So we enjoy chewing up finer points of the pasuk on occasion, and sometimes I wonder what the heck is the teacher thinking?

Well, this was one for the books, Maydele asks me about a particular Rashi that responds to the question, why Tamar was to be killed, says Rashi "as the daughter of Shem ben Noach, the Kohen, she was to be burnt"
OK Maydele asks "We burn all daughters of kohanim? 'Cause we've got cousins who....
Me"what lemme see that question"
Teacher asks 'why was tamar to be killed'?
I gotta explain this, but very carefully.
Me "ok When Yosef was sold, Shimon and Levi wanted to kill him. As Yakov on his deathbed said they had tempers, and they truly thought it was justified.
Ruvain, the oldest, knew better and said "let G-d decide - put him in a pit " that happened to be full 'o poisonous snakes 'n other nasties. The pasuk does say that Ruvain wanted to save Yosef's butt.
Yehuda not knowing this but agreeing- felt he couldn't fight the crowd, suggested that they sell Yosef. And so it was.

Later Yakov had immense grief and the brothers blamed Yahuda, that he shoulda said leave Yosef alone and sent the kid home.
Yahuda was troubled enough to leave home and then spent some time with a Caananite dude named Shia (Yes Maydele sounds Jewish, but no he wasn't) and married his daughter and had 3 boys, Er, Onan and Shaylu. Bas Shia dies in childbirth of Shaylu.
When Er was old enough Yahuda arranges a shidduch for him, Tamar daughter of Shem son of Noach."

So here comes the difficult part!

"Tamar was gorgeous and Er not wanting to spoil her beauty wouldn't set up house together.
Hashem wasnt happy 'bout that and Er died.
So Tamar was introduced to Onan who refused to Yibum his brothers memory and even though he married her, he acted the same way, so that there would be no child.
Hashem polished off Onan too.
Yahuda freaked at this point and told Tamar go home until Shaylu would be older.
So off Tamar goes.
After a few years Tamar realizes its not gonna happen with Shaylu, so she devises a plan. she dresses herself as a disguise.... and sits outside Avraham's tent, (seems that it was a museum or something) Yahuda, out with the sheep gets this wierd notion to walk the sheep thataway, and sees the .....interesting lady.
They get married and in the morning Yahuda goes to get all his stuff, comes back to find that the lady he married, was missing!

6 months later people start talking that Onans widow was pregnant and yahuda convenes a Beis din and finds her guilty of being untzniusdig and must have married someone else without getting Chalitza from Shaylu or Yahuda, for which the sentence is death.
Being that she was Shem ben Noach kid that makes her a Kohens kid for which the regular death is replaced with burning.

There's lotsa more medrash to this story, but that's the gist.
Try explaining this to a barely teenage girl, without any sexual references (sigh)
L-rd knows why the teacher chose to make the parents squirm.


Anonymous said...

you shoulda told her she was mzaneh i.e. not tznius and have the teacher wet their pants err skirt. I pity you, though you did well!

Anonymous said...
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Lady-Light said...

Slightly off-topic: If you like my blog, please link it on yours, and I will reciprocate.
Thank you, and kol tuv.

m00kie said...

you sound like a great dad

ive read on so many blogs how ffb's werent allowed to ask questions, never got answers bla bla bla
its nice to see theres one daddy who takes his daughters questions seriously :)

Y.Y. said...

you could have done it simple the short answer to the question was is that since tamar married someone she wasnt allowed to marry she recieves a harsher punishment since she is a kohenes
poor kid your explaination is way to long for your maydele to put on a paper

M said...

that was great!

הצעיר שלמה בן רפאל לבית שריקי ס"ט said...

ha, great post. It's true the "too hot for Torah" issue is an important one. I defenetely don't think the hareidim are right though; I saw a question in Rabbi Twerski's "dear dr. dear rabbi" book, and someone said they don't know whart to do about their kid who follows along in the Torah, during k'riat hatorah! So now it's assur to read the torah! Nothing wrong with being open with girls about sexuality (but better not raise them on nudist colonies- in my humble opinion), listen twelve year olds have all-out sex in America. B'ezrat hashem I'll post a long article about sex in the not so distant future, until then; keep learning "too hot for Torah" with your daughter!

Again, only because it's your daughter. I admit- I was once a Rebbe for 12 year old gemara, and a kid asked me why it's assur to sllep on your belly (that's what we were learning), I just couldn't tell him 'it might cause him to have an outof place erection' tooo weird...


הצעיר שלמה בן רפאל לבית שריקי ס"ט said...

whoops! I meant the hareidim are "not" right! Sorry. And by the way; maybe you should go see what kind of stuff that sicko mora is watching at home...

muse said...

I thought it was one of the passages "not mentioned" to the kiddies. I have an old, very old, linear translted chumach, and that part isn't translated.

aoc gold said...

Bed In Summer


In winter I get up at night
And dress by yellow candle-light. 。

In summer quite the other way,

I have to go to bed by day.


I have to go to bed and see

The birds still hopping on the tree,

Or hear the grown-up people's feet
Still going past me in the street. 。


And does it not seem hard to you,

When all the sky is clear and blue,

And I should like so much to play,
To have to go to bed by day?
-----by wow powerleveling