Thursday, November 16, 2006


TV and big screen.
When I was younger I had lotsa time to watch 'em.
Now B"H the kids are older, and spousy and I have very little free time on our hands.
We used to go out to eat and an occasional movie.

Not anymore now we do homework, the usual 'what's for supper tomorrow?', paperwork, laundry, etc.

Do I miss the old times? Nah.

As I get older and appreciate different things and different aspects of life, I realize that, sure I enjoyed the flicks as much as the next guy, but the enjoyment was rather short lived.
Watching a good movie, draws you in into the story, I mean that's the point of it, right? So for one hour and 38 minutes you are in another world.
The other world imparts new thoughts and feelings that become part of one's psych, whether you want it or not.

I was reading on other blog sites about the shiduch scene or crises, new marriages such as what was written lately at
Ya know something, I really believe that movies skew the real view of things and how they should be.
An old friend of mine, divorced, falling off the derech, was looking to try again. so he calls every shadchan in the book and some that weren't.
He goes on dates.
Some days he comes to work with a smile and some days he grumbles all day.
We talked, he said he wanted a hot girl gorgeous with long hair.
I smile, been there done that, think I know better.
Eventually he shows up with the good news and a week later brings her in for us to check out.

Uuum....ok.....I would not have placed her in the HOT column, but hey what do I know, every pots got its cover. Yeah she was a size 2 and she did have long dark hair, but......

Anyway they got married, I still have the bencher.
I suppose you wanna know what happened ,there could be 2 major possibilities here:
1. They had a kid pregnancy made her fat, she cut off her hair to fit under the sheital. So he didn't really get what he wanted. Or did he?
2. He realized that long dark hair doesn't actually do anything and got divorced within 6 months B"H with out having any kids.

I'm not gonna tell you.

I'm just gonna finish my point here. I think that 'Movies' have changed the way we, and mean males AND females, perceive our values.
Warner Bros tells us which parts of the body should be what size we stupidly nod and believe.

There is a pasuk in the Torah when yakov wakes in the morning and 'hinay he leah'.
'surprise- it's Leah'.
What happened to the woman he wanted to marry?
I think that the average guy goes out once twice or even fifty times with a girl.
Thinks he knows her.
But the day or maybe even weeks later 'v'hinay he leah'.
Don't marry the bombshell, cause when you peel off the clothing and the makeup, the shell, all you're left with is a bomb.
Most women do not remain a size 2 for very long boys check out the long term built in features.
Humor, smile, politeness, yes do marry her for brain.
I'm not saying she should be ugly, chas v'sholom until love sets in, at least be attracted to her, helps can't hurt.
But I keep on reading about how the girls complain that they seem to only date guys who want a size 2.
Yup that creates a shiduch crises.

I think they are dating fools and should be happy that the boys aren't interested, who wants to spend their life with someone who really wants to marry Ms. Osgedarta Shiksa.
Those are the guys who let movies influence their values.
Leave em be they'll grow up, eventually?


heimishinbrooklyn said...

Great post! Wonderful writing style, too. My husband also has a friend in the dating scene. Many times he refused to even listen if the girl was a bit overweight. My husband exlained to him that weight can come off but middos and manners you can't teach someone. He was complaining that the good-looking ones were bitchy. Well, many girls these days feel that if they look good/sexy then everything will be great, and they deserve things and it should get handed to them...It is not so simple. It's exremely hard to find a girl with everything, so sometimes you have to sacrifice.

Regarding the other topic, I'm young now and we do watch movies go out all the time. I'm sure it fades as we get more busy. I can't imagine myself being middle-aged and watching movies. Just doesn't sound right.

P.S. FIRST!!!!!!!!

Chaim Chusid said...

Movies aher, movies ahiyn, your writing moves!

Great style!


tech guy said...

I can relate to the TV influence thing.
Everytime i jury rig something, I have the Mcgyver theme humming in head!

Y.Y. said...

yes movies influence but hey i think WB get it right lol

yingerman said...

True on the shiduch
but regarding movies, time flies


Tech guy
Who's mcgyver?

As usual you are still an a$@

anonym00kie said...

you really have a great writing style! obviously you're right..everything we expose ourselves to, influences us.. thats the brains we were created with.. big absorbant sponges..
but its not just a sponge, if it was, we could keep it in the right place, unfortunately it has a heart, eyes, desires, curiosity.. attached to it.. and so its a sponge out of control chasing after any form of stimulation it can find..
anyway.. great post..:)

yingerman said...

thanx anony00
I thought about it and I think the kids straying is our fault

Absolutely our own fault.
Yes the internet is here to stay and Hollywood and its unmoral values are inescapable, more than ever before.
But still children are true to the dictum of "Do as I do, not as I say".
Kids still need parents to show them the way.
If I throw a dirty wrapper from the car so will my kids. And they will also do it at home.
If I talk loshen hara, so will my kids and they will do it with chutzpa to the offender's face.
If I talk in shul bien gavra l'gavra then my kids will talk in in middle of shemona esra.
Etc etc
That's just the way it is!

chuck said...

also friends bad company goes a long way

anonym00kie said...

i agree 100%
were you saying that disagree with my comment? :) cuz i agree with you! i wasnt talking about children being sponges.. i was taklnig about OUR brains being sponges.. from 1 days old to 120 years old...